Christmas songs

I love Christmas. I know we aren’t allowed to say the ‘C’ word, which is dumb. Christmas is a cultural holiday, not a religious one. Not to me, anyhow. No sir, I am not Christian… not by a longshot. That being said, the holiday isn’t based on Christ’s birthday. Nope, it is widely understood and agreed that Christ was born in the Spring. December 25th is the winter solstice, which is a pagan holiday. The Christians quite resourcefully nasced it. Reference Easter for this little clever habit of absconding with pagan holidays and re-purposing them.

That isn’t my point though. My point is that Christmas is a society wide holiday. You don’t have to place it above Chanukkah or anything else… but let’s not pretend that it isn’t Christmas. Again, this has nothing to do with my point, which is coming right around the corner.

These Christmas lyrics freak me out!

In the Meadow we can build a snowman
and pretend that he is Parson Brown
he’ll say ‘are you married’ and we’ll say ‘no, man’
but you can do the job if you’re in town

Seriously, what the shit is going on here?
First off, it ain’t a preacher… it is a snowman. Try less LSD next time. Let’s say it was a preacher, though. What business of his is it if you are married? None! We’re you screwing in the snow bank? No? Then it ain’t no one’s business if you are married or not.

Then we have this: ‘but you can do the job if you’re in town’. I guess it is true what they say about marriage being devalued in our society. The choice to marry or not should be taken WAY more seriously than on the whim of a hallucinated and pushy snowman.

It took me forever to marry my wife, this was my fault. We were dating for 7 or 8 years before I proposed. Folks would often ask ‘When are you two getting married?’ I hated that question, because it really is a very personal question. That being said, I should have told people that I was waiting for Parson Brown. Yeah, say that… and then just stare at the yard waiting for something to happen.

What have we learned here? Well, Christmas is for everyone. A snowman is not your preacher. Take less LSD. Do not marry on the advice of a hallucination.

That being said, we might not talk before Christmas. My computer is in the basement and I can’t walk. I busted my ankle and am on crutches… so might not get down to write much. Know that I love you, and have an awesome holiday. It’s all good! You got family and friends and good eats ahead of you this weekend? If you don’t, know that you always have me… and no you can’t come over.

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