Friday Fives

What’s something that demands ketchup?

onion rings and burgers.  That is about it.  Most other dipping demands are met by ranch these days.  I LOVE me some ranch, but am super particular about the right kind.  We are the Ranch Generation

What’s the best thing to do with the leftover packets of cheese and red-pepper flakes you get with pizza delivery?

you save them for when you need them for pizza.  MUST have those red peppers for pizza.  I can go either way on the parm.

What’s something (besides salad) that’s good with salad dressing?

well, I just addressed the ranch dressing piece.  However, I am thinking you are meaning the default ‘Italian’ style vinaigrette?  It is really good on pasta salad.  My wife makes a pasta salad that will make you slap your mama.

What’s a condiment you’re especially brand-loyal to?

well, I am not.  Except… for ranch.  But, I don’t even know the name of the ranch I love.  It’s not hidden valley, that stuff is too thick and sweet.  It is the stuff that wing places have.  Wing places always have the right ranch.

What’s the weirdest use of condiments you’ve seen by other people?

what kind of question is that?  Are you trying to get me to tell you that story about the guy who got his dick stuck in the bottle of ketchup at school?  Because… I won’t.  You know, maybe David Caruso doesn’t exactly wanna be famous for that.  I mean, I have to imagine that when you google the name ‘david caruso’ without ‘david caruso gets dick stuck in ketchup bottle’ coming up first.  Hardly fair.  Not cool, bro.  Not cool at all.


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