- If you were given one million dollars, on the condition that you had to give half of it away, how would you go about giving away half a million dollars?
I would miracle someone who was caught doing a good deed. Like… hide and watch and see who picks up a piece of litter that wasn’t theirs and throws it into the trash. That is who I would give the money to.
- Do you write letters or send cards to anyone via the postal system regularly, only for special occasions such as birthdays, or not at all?
regular post? Not at all. Here is why, the goddamn stamps change price too often. NOTE – I am not bitching about the price, or that they have to increase. I get that, and I don’t mind that at all. I mind having 42 cent stamps and that isn’t enough so now I have to go buy 3 cent stamps. That makes me never ever want to use the post office again, on principle. Now, I know they are getting away from it with ‘forever stamps’. I applaud this, they need to do more of that.
- What is the most treasured memento you have kept?
kept from what? I have a gold Buffalo tie clip from my grandfather. I think it is all I have of his, so that is very special to me. Also, have a cool leather jacket from my dad that means a ton to me. Plus, let’s be honest, I look really good in it.
- If one of your friends phones you at 4am because they are depressed and upset, but you have an important job interview in the morning. What do you do?
of course I help them. I can use this fodder in the interview. They will gobble that crap up. To be honest, though, it wouldn’t happen. I don’t sleep anywhere near my phone. Unless I am on call with the Red Cross, my phone stays far far away from where I am sleeping. Who is going to call? I know this sounds terrible and crass, but what if someone dies? Well, if they died at 2 am… they are still going to be dead at 9 am when I get up and wander over to my phone. Yes, I know… mean. See, I really don’t like to talk on the phone, at all, ever. I use maybe 12 minutes of cell time a month. I love my cell phone, and never am without it, but I don’t use it as a phone.
- What is the phrase or quote that sums up who you are as a person?
If there are no dogs in heaven, then when I die, I want to go where they went – Will Rogers