I told you so – Michele Bachmann edition

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Today, we are going to talk about Michele Bachmann.  She is the disgraced and scandal tainted representative from Minnesota.  She is no longer the darling of the right, and has come to shame them.  She got busted in a very serious campaign finance scandal***.  She has long been unpopular.  However, her finance scandal coupled with her hate speech against gays has made her a liability to the right.  It was very widely believed that in the coming elecion, she would lose her seat.  Last election, she barely barely won her seat.  Then, she got caught busted stealing and re-routing campaign money.  It was bad.  her own staff, along with life long GOP staffers turned on her.  This is incredibly unusual for the right to turn on each other.  They are almost always better disciplined than the left on that stuff.

For your convenience and ease of reference, I am going to start specifying which things I was right about.  I am right so often, that I just can’t call posts “i was right” or “i told you so”.  I know that sounds incredibly pompous, but I am serious. I am doing this for reference functionality.  It just happens too mch.  I mean, there absolutely is a legitimate reason I call this blog what I do.

So… seeing the writing was on the well for her next term, she announced she wouldn’t run for re-election.  I am almost positive she was forced out.  So, folks figured she would take her failed and disgraced embarassment and go away.  Not me.  I saw this coming from a mile away.  Let’s take a look at just how correct I was

You may be thinking that she is a horrible person, and a homophobe, and a thief and a bully.  You might think she is finally going to jail, and that is why she dropped out of the congressional race.  Wrong!  I bet your life she is going to drop out to run for president.  But how, you say, she is a criminal?  Oh no, she will pull the martyr card, and people will eat that shit up!

Yup.  and I NAILED it.  This was only 9 days I wrote it.  She announced the other day she is looking at a presidential run.  Man, I am good.  That isn’t why I write this.  I write this to help you.  If you spend your time here, you will be far ahead of the conversation.  If you reading, when this Salon article popped up, you could have said to all your friends “yeah, we saw that coming”.

anyhow, another warning.  She is going to take all the fucked up shit she has done and use it against us.  She is going to decry her scandal as “politics, and business as usual in Washington DC”.  Seriously.  She will use those exact words verbatim.  Instead of acknowledging what a hate monger she is, she will explain “if loving America, and the family values that made this country what is it wrong, then I don’t want to be right.”  Then, she will intimate she was indicted because she is a target as a women and a Christian.

Oh, I just love that angle.  The ‘I am oppressed because I am a Christian’ tact.  That is such horseshit.  Christians run America.  it is a Christian country, with some 70% of people identifying themselves as one of Christianity’s thousands of offshoots.  Christians are winning, that is a fact.  To say “I am oppressed because I am a christian” is akin to saying “I am maligned in the big finance community because I am an old right white guy”.  Wrong.  You ARE the big finance community.  Guess what, though, it will work.  Because almost all Americans identify themselves as Christian, she instantly becomes credible and relatable.

I am going back over that Salon article to make sure she didn’t use those talking points yet.  I am SO positive they will happen, I just want to make sure I said them first.

**** Ok.  It wasn’t exactly very serious.  I over spoke.  VERY serious is what John Edwards did.  He got caught funneling his campaign money to his baby mama.  He was stealing money, while banging a staffer, while running for President, while his wife was dying of cancer.  That is just the lowest of the low.  I give you righties tons of shit for being immoral… but this was an epic shame of all Democrats of all time.  Nixonian, in fact.

**** yes. that is a very unflattering picture of her, and on purpose.  I don’t like her.  Want fairness?  Go elsewhere.  I am here as the Supreme Court of Public Opinion.  At least I didn’t use this one!

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One thought on “I told you so – Michele Bachmann edition

  1. Pingback: Friday Fives – hardly even bothered edition | I am Correct

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