I want to talk to you about ‘Push Polling’. It’s a political trick, and it works. There is an off year election coming up, so I want you know these tricks. People say ‘negative campaigning doesn’t work’. They are wrong, it almost always works. Push Polling is kinda awesome and brilliant. It’s also wrong, really deeply morally wrong.
So, here is what Push Polling is. Let’s say the candidate’s name is Lono. Let’s say you are the opposition to Lono. In this scenario, Lono is a Democrat and the opposition is a Republican. It’s a fair generalization, as this tactic was pioneered by the GOP. So, they call you and say “if I told you that Lono wanted to murder puppies who don’t pay taxes. Is that something you would support?”
Now, this is nonsense. However, now I have to answer questions about puppy murder. Now the headline in the papers says “candidate Lono denies puppy murder”. Now, when you type in ‘Lono’ in google, it will auto-complete ‘puppy murder’. It’s fucked up, and it works. Shit, just me writing this article will connect those words together. That is why I use the pseudonym.
Hunter Thompson did this to great effect against Ed Muskie. He thought it would be funny to spread a rumor that he was hooked on Ibogaine. It was brilliant, and of course evil. Most importantly, it worked. Now this poor Muskie guy is defending himself against a totally fabricated claim. In fact, when you Wiki ‘Ibogaine’, this scandal comes up.
While in Wisconsin covering the primary election for the United States presidential election of 1972, gonzo journalist Hunter S. Thompson submitted a satirical article to his editor at Rolling Stone accusing presidential nominee Edmund Muskie of being addicted to ibogaine. When Rolling Stonepublished the piece, many readers, and even other journalists, did not realize that Thompson’s assertion was facetious. The claim was completely unfounded, and Thompson was surprised that anyone believed it.
This was all the way back in 1972. So, obviously this stuff isn’t limited to Republicans. They just mastered it. There is a LOT more I could talk about. However, this book does it perfectly. No need to rehash – just buy this book. So, if anyone calls you this fall, be suspicious. Why write about this now? Because it is always political season. It is always mothers day. I think you can appreciate your mom outside her one designated day. We can talk about black issues outside of February. As my last boss said sagely ‘every day you are interviewing for your next job here’.
In closing, I do not murder puppies. I resent the implication. In fact, I am puppy strong. This will be no puppygate.