Pandora, Nickelback, and not exactly telling my wife everything

America ,

I am for equality and love and choice.  I am a Democrat, these are my core principles.  I wish I could tell you that I also don’t believe in judging…  except clearly that is not the case.

Anyhow, I wanted to share a moral fable with you.  It’s a story of love, trust, marriage, and subversion.

It starts with Pandora.  I LOVE Pandora.  I use it daily.  I think they are a great company and I want them to succeed.  I know there are now about 11 similar services.  My Pandora is all set and customized, so I don’t to hear about slacker and sticther and beats etc etc etc.  I even pay  for Pandora.  It’s like $40 a year.  SO worth it… and I want them to be profitable.  I want the artists to get paid.

So, because I pay, I have basically unlimited channels.  I use about 15, and I gave the wifey the passwords so she could make her own stations.  That is how loving and compassionate I am.  She can listen to whatever she wants.  What do I care?  I certainly don’t expect her to listen to Dylan all day.  Hell, I don’t expect ANYONE to listen to that much Dylan except myself.

First problem is this, she doesn’t ‘feed and water’ her stations.  This is a biggie, and a big problem.  You don’t just put Pandora on and listen.  No.  NEVER.  If I find you also doing this, I will have your radio taken away.  Pandora demands easy maintenance.  For the first year, it is simple.  EVERY SONG you hear you need to thump up or down.  Trust me, this pays mad dividends down the road.  Think of it, in every possible sense, as the break in period for your car.  That first 1,000 miles you have to take very specific care.  This is how you get 300K miles out of a car.  Or, if you have a GM, up to 300 miles.

It’s why you had to go to school.  It sucked at the time, right?   But, it literally pays 60 years of dividends.  This is why you MUST feed and water your Pandora.

This comes to my problem, and my dirty secret.  I don’t manage my wifey’s stations.  It isn’t my business.  Just like her email, or that Maroon 5 channel she has.

She recently showed me a dope ass station she built.  It was a journey station. So, there is Boston in there, ac/dc, Led Zepp… it is just a great station.  I guess this shows my age a bit.  I liked it so much I have been listening at work.

That is when I crossed the line, and I need your advice.  I made a move, on her station, which is not my business.  Unless she is reading this, she still doesn’t know.

It is like if she finds ciggies on me, she throws them out, for my own good.  That is kinda how I see this.  On her Journey station, Nickelback came up.  For the good of EVERYONE, I had to thumb it down.  I am not proud of this, but I did what needed to be done for own good.  Remember when your parents would say things like “I don’t give a shit if this is your bedroom.  As long as you live under my room you live by my rules!”  It’s a much more loving version of that, right?

So, was I wrong?  Just kidding, of course not you asshole.  Let’s be cool and maybe not mention to her.

 

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