Friday Fives – careful with that Axe, Eugene

New year 2016 party billboard with pied mosaic mandala on black background.

If you could ban anything, what would you ban? Why?

Cell phone anything while driving.  I am not taking the high ground here, I do the same thing.  I see people weaving in an out of traffic, totally zoned out on their stupid phones… damn near killing me 20 feet away. Of course, I immediately tweeted what dangerous idiots they were!

what are you now too old for?

this shit.  scratch that, I am not a cop 2 weeks from retirement.  Damn, such a good line!

 A good and proper new year’s even drinking blow out.  Due to a new job that needs me there always, I am working through all the holidays (thanksgiving, christmas, new years eve, new years… etc).  I don’t mind so much.  I get to help people, and I’ll get a free week of vacation out of this in comp time.  My point being, though, is the holidays don’t seem like much when all you can do is sleep, get some laundry done, and head back out there.

I know it is dumb to complain that I have a job I love and I have to work a lot.  How could I complain when I have so much to be thankful for.  I’ll tell ya, buster… because its my damn blog.

 What is your most noticeable scar, and how did you get it? 

I have a couple on my forehead from falling a LOT and cracking my head open.  Let’s start with the pool story.  I was at swimming lessons, and there were stairs.  There was banister handrail thing there.  I decided to ski down it on my butt like cool people do in movies.  Problem was, the railing had a cap at the bottom.  A cap that most hatefully halted forward motion and propelled me to the ground face first.

See this cap on the stairs?  The big ornate square thing?  That is an extreme example, but it demonstrates the physics of the issue.  Imagine if you were sliding down those stairs, not realizing the cap was there… and just thinking you will joyfully land on your feet like the Fonz that you are.

What are your top 5 most rewatchable movies?

Princess bride, fish called wanda, Harold and maude, Spinal Tap, and Harvey

What movie actually pissed you off?

I remember being angry at the movie ‘Drive’.  In the commercials, it was Gosling has this hotshot driver and quasi mob guy.  Ok, a caper!  Capers are my favorite genre by a million miles.  It wasn’t, though.  It was a slow and thoughtful burn.  The first scene of the movie is a driving scene, then it never happens again.  I was pissed.  BUT… I went back a couple years later and watched it again because the cast is just fucking sick.

If you watch it again, and understand it has NO driving at ALL…and if you just change the name of the movie to ‘dude, Bryan Cranston is in it… that is all you need to know.  Plus, your wife gets to watch Ryan Gosling for 90 minutes’ you will see it is a really great movie.  It was just mis-packaged and mis-marketed.

in fact, these days I choose movies based almost entirely on cast.  Is Bryan Cranston in it?  Or… did Ron Howard direct in?   Then you shut your mouth and go rent it.  Not go see it, just go rent it.  Between my tv and bose hifi, seeing a movie at my house is pretty great.  I tell you that not to impress you, but to encourage you to get some nice shit in your place, if you can afford it.  Don’t give me that “there is something special and communal about seeing a move in a proper cineplex’ jive, either.  For Star Wars, or Lord of the Rings… yes.  For everything else, your TV is fine.  You don’t need to see a Sandler movie in digital surround sound on an iMax screen.



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