Friday Fives – my mom was right, always!

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What do you usually have for breakfast?

I don’t.  I don’t like breakfast.  I don’t like the food, and (most importantly (I REALLY REALLY don’t like the time of day.  At ALL).  Since I have to participate in society, and am almost required to wake up every single day… a breakfast is minimal.  Maybe an egg or two, maybe some protein powder, maybe a protein bar.  Odds are, it is just some beef jerky while I am driving.  Beef jerky is perfect food.  To paraphrase Ben Franklin, it is proof god loves us and wants us to be happy’.  All protein, with almost no fat or sugar or carbs.

If you are driving, EVER, jerky is perfect for road trips.  It doesn’t need to be hot or cold.  It doesn’t need silverware, and you don’t have to take your eyes off the wheel to eat it.

What’s your ‘thing’ that you always have to explain to new people?

I guess that I was a long haired deadhead who got to follow the Dead and Jerry around while he was still alive.  I was at the legendary 90 and 91 shows that are so well regarded they have released 2 box sets of those tours.  I still am all those things, I just don’t look the part anymore.  Now I am a corporate stooge, just like you.  It’s what Jerry would have wanted.

What are some unethical and possibly illegal life hacks?

How to lie to people.  If you know psychology, you know how to real people who are lying to you.  They fidget and won’t look you in the eye.  So, to lie effectively, don’t fidget and look them directly in the eye.  Bonus body language?  Tip your head to the left a bit.

not that I ever lied to you, though.

What is the most annoying thing your neighbor does?

Texts me to remind me my dogs are driving him crazy.  I feel terrible, he is 100% correct.  Thanks a lot, hounds!  Bonus?  He just moved, and I honestly feel our dogs were probably a big part of it.  I feel terrible, he is a very good man and was always kind to us until the dogs kinda severed our relationship.

What was the dumbest rule your parents had growing up?

My parents were saints, and my mother is a god to me.  Don’t you dare question a thing she ever did.  Seriously!  So, I will tell you a great rule she had… no motorcycles.  She said ‘if you want to live in my house, no motorcycles!’.  I agree, and have the same rule with my dogs.

 

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