Friday Fives – potpourri edition


How can you spot someone isn’t a local ?

People who browse too long at the pot store. Not that I would know, or have even been there. But… out of state folks at a pot store are like taking a Russian from the 1980s to Wal Mart. “why are there so many choices? Can I really have whatever I want” what is the difference between this one and that one?” There is a great piece of advice Barry Sanders used to give to rookies. He was one of the greatest running backs of all time. Every time he scored, he just walked up to the ref and handed him the ball. No drama, no spike, no endzone dance. Why? “act like you have been there before.”

When did you have the most difficult time staying professional?

In professional environments. I have a communication style that is very frank, and effective, and appreciated. However, it is rarely appropriate in the ‘lets act like grown ups’ sort of thing.

What song do you most want to hear on your deathbed?

Jimi Hendrix Angel, but ONLY the solo acoustic demo version. That, and maybe the ‘Day Brings’ from Brad. And how about ‘the Rising’ from Springsteen. Lastly… ‘Light Years’, from Pearl Jam. It’s about the death of a friend, and it’s so friggin’ beautiful it hurts:

“we were but stones… your light made us stars”

What is the scariest thing that has woken you up in the middle of the night?

Silence. We were camping years ago in Westcliff with the horses. The horses were loud, and not fans of their temporary pens. For a while, the racket drove me crazy… until I heard something worse – nothing.

I stuck my head out, and sure enough our horse was gone. So, cut to me walking around in the dark, in my boxers and boots. No shirt, no pants. I am wandering through campsites and trailers looking for my horse with a flashlight. I have a halter in my hands, but I don’t know much about horses at ALL. I never grew up with horses, and the wifey had just gotten this one. Now, I have no fear or looking for or catching a wild horse. Back then, though, I think I was just as afraid of finding him as I was of not finding him.

Good thing about horses, they almost never go far. Never had that happen. They go about 20 feet away, just to eat that grass right over there. I got him back. Still quite proud of that moment. And proud that darkness gave me the cover of 1) losing my horse like a noob, and 2) running around in the dark in my underwear in a panic. Heroically, all was handled well and rather quickly. Its rather cold at altitude at 3 am when you are in nothing but your undies. You are more than welcome for the visual. It’s the life of a semi pro horse wrangler. Where is my Discovery show? Mike Rowe wasn’t even there to narrate. Just sayin’, it woulda been nice.

See… NOW I know that horses don’t go far at all. They just say hi to a neighbor mostly. Back them, I figured he was probably 30 miles away searching for freedom. See, for some reason… horses carry NO identification. They don’t chip them, or halter them, or brand them, or mark them. If you are at an endurance race, 85% of the horses are arabs. In the dark 80 brown horses of the esacty same height (about 14, to 14.5 hands) all look identical. 15 years later…they still do. A bay horse is a bay horse.

What old person things do you do?

Nothing I am going to cop to here. It is true, though, we become our parents. If only because they were right. They tried to tell us, and show us, and we just thought they were ruining the fun and worrying too much. Nope, they were right. Turns out you do NOT walk into a judges home at 3 am with roses for his daughter, as a gesture of affection, when you are stark nekkid. I thought that was just an old timey aphorism. Nope, that one carries some teeth, lemme tell ya!

Romance is not dead, but neither is that restraining order.



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