Friday Fives – Longer Boats

How automated is your home

Fun question.  Are you planning on breaking in?  Again.  Let’s just say for security reasons I won’t talk what security I have.  We’ll just talk modern conveniences.  I have my thermostat online, and can see the temps inside the house, and control them from my cell phone.  This is more than convenience.  I used to have manual thermostat, just like you jerks.  We went to Phx one Christmas (which we actually do every Christmas) and while we were gone… the heater went out.  To be specific, it’s a gas forced air system, which a big ass heater thingy in the basement.  When we got home, it was 40 degrees inside.  Thankfully, no pipes had frozen or anything.  Only loss was all my tropical fish died, except the goldfish.  Goldfish are amazing, btw.  They will outlive cockroaches.  They also have memory.  Goldfish can remember music, and people (like the one who feeds them) and such for 6 months.

Quite awesomely, I hopped on my cell phone (it was like midnight when we got home, didn’t want to call anyone until business hours if I could avoid it) and found a way to hotwire it!  Yeah, I fixed that shit, by myself, in the middle of the night.  I did it by bypassing something, forgot what it was.  But about 8 inches of 12 gauge copper wire (12 gauge is usually indicated by a red plastic coating) and it was up and running.  Total cost to me, about 1 penny’s worth of wire.  Wire that is ‘junk’ but I keep with me all the time just in case.  I keep some 12 gauge wire in my truck, too.  Point being, I went out the next day and spent $100 on an online thermostat (whereas the exact same one that wasn’t online was about $40) and I have been online ever since.

Favorite thing about this technology?  Being able to lay in bed and adjust the heat up or down.  Even better?  I used to sleep hot… about 70 degrees.  Wife wanted it at about 65 degrees.  So who wins?  We all win!   I would keep it at 70, and tell her it was 65.  Win win!  But sometimes… she would say “it feels way hotter than that, I am going to check”.  That gave me about 6 to 10 seconds to grab my phone, pull the app up, and change the temp.   Worked every time!  Don’t worry, she doesn’t read this blog.  Don’t worry, she doesn’t read.   – UPDATE – she was right, and now I do sleep a little colder.  When I am home during the day (which is every day now post covid) I keep the house at 70.  But before bed I drop it to 67.

What were we talking about?  Oh, online?  Outside of security stuff, that is about it.  Oh, my weather station is online, and I LOVE it.  its got current temp in and out (which they all do) but humidity in and out, forecast, wind speed, and adjusted temperature due to wind speed.  Free hint… very loosely it equates to about 1 to 1.  Ie, a 10mph wind makes 42 hour feel like 32 out.  Where I live (high altitude Eastern plans of Colorado… think more Kansas than Rocky Mountain High) it is VERY windy, almost always.  So, having the anemometer (wind speed measure thingy) is absolutely critical.

Oh, and my Traeger.  That is most definitely online.  When I use it (I kept my regular old propane grill as well) I am likely doing an 8 to 12 hour cook.  It used to be that was an all day thing.  You got up at 4 am and got shit going.  Then you stayed close by feeding the fire for consistent temperate and drinking all day with Earl.  Which is great, except in your wife’s eyes.  Now… I go about my day and just keep an eye on my cell phone.  It not only updates me with info like temp of meat and temp of grill… I can adjust the heat from my phone.  A computer keeps it at exactly the right temp.

What is the next cool online thing you want/need?

Well, I do love gadgets and technology.  But… I don’t need my coffee maker or crock pot online.  For TV, I’d like to do away with the TV and have some kind of projector.  Then I could do things like have my tv be 55”, or for a cool movie or football I could make it 100 inches.  Am pretty sure that technology exists, and has for a while… but its still prohibitively expensive.

Aside from that?  Without even knowing, I can tell you it would likely be kitchen based.  If I am not working, I am in the kitchen cooking or cleaning.  I LOVE our kitchen.  I feel in the kitchen the way manly men feel in their shop, it is my domain.  What Nick Offerman is to wood, I am to the kitchen and delicious and extremely improvised goodies.  The way I wished I felt in my shop.  And I am handy around the house and in a shop, but I have no mastery or passion for tools that I do for working in the kitchen.

What is the best Ghibli movie

What’s Ghibli?  Sure, I am going to google it in a minute, but want to state now I don’t know what it is.  Oh, and I STILL won’t make Affleck/Lopez move pun.  Gobble Gobble!  UPDATE – google has explained to me they are an Anime studio.  I don’t watch anime, and I am not Akira.  Can’t help you here, kid.  Keep movin’

What is the best comedy stand up special aired

Ever?  Delirious by Eddie Murphy.  STILL laugh out loud funny 40 years later.  Next would be Chris Rock’s first one.  Was that ‘Bigger and Blacker’?  No.  hold on, lemme google it.  Bring the Pain.  Yes, that one was also a masterpiece.  Speaking of Rock, did you know he is going to do the first live stand up set ever?  I know when you watch comedy, it was live.  But, it was taped about a year ago.  Rock is doing one on  Netflix live in real time.  It’s gonna be March 4^th.  So, get your Netflix password shit sorted out, because you can’t have mine anymore.

What’s one movie/show/song  that can instantly put you in a better mood?

Anything and everything by Cat Stevens.  My god, look at this man’s face when he was young.  He defines the term ‘beatific’.  Every cliche of ‘live in the moment’ and ‘be here now’ he seems to exude.  I have to also assume he got SO much tail.  sorry, I know its crude.  But dude… really.  I mean… SO much tail and even Allah and God had a meeting.  It was a draft pick thing, but they knew he couldn’t play for both teams.  Allah won, prolly with that tail of 72 virgins in that afterlife.  I mean… there are probably 72 virgins in his dressing room right now, at 80 years old.  Those are just the leftovers from when he was in his 20s.

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