Stranger in a Strange Land – casting the film

I am listening to Heinlan’s ‘Stranger in a Strange Land’.  Wish I could tell you I was reading it, but I don’t have the time.  Well… I guess I don’t make the time.  I am a little more than halfway through it.  It isn’t just very well written, it is very well narrated.  This then becomes a total ‘theater of the mind’ experience as I drive.  Because it is so well told, and on so many levels… I am casting the movie in my head.  I don’t do this with every book, just the extraordinary ones (like Christopher Moore stuff).  The book is a story about a Martian on Earth, and the oddness that comes with it. The first name that came to mind was Giovanni Ribisi.  Not even sure what role he would play. I just think he is the best actor around, and so I would see anything he works in. Even though… dude is a Scientologist.   Then, I thought “wait, this is a movie about Martians. Wouldn’t Scientologists be perfect?” But then, their thought lawyers sent my thoughts a cease and desist.

There are a lot of Scientologist actors.  So why not? Let’s cast the movie using nothing but Scientologists.  First, a quick primer on Scientology and why it’s pertinent to aliens.

Scientology is ironically very well grounded in Freudian psychology.  They believe that traumatic experiences and repressed emotions are fucking you up and keeping you from being happy.  I say it’s ‘ironic’ because Scientologists are militantly against psychology. True story. This is so odd because up to this point, their stuff is based on very sound psychology. They (Scientologists) also believe the answer to these issues is through therapy.  This is where we diverge. In order to purge yourself of these repressed issues, you need to take a series of incredibly expensive classes to reach enlightenment. It’s called ‘going up the Bridge’ and costs hundreds of thousands of dollars. 

The end goal is their version of enlightenment (or… Nirvana)… it is called ‘going Clear’.  To attend these classes is to ‘audit’ them. I find that an amusing term, since ‘auditing’ a class in college is when you don’t pay, but you also don’t get credit.  Nothing I said above is controversial, or secret. And it isn’t weird… yet.

Here is where it gets weird, and why Scientologists are so roundly mocked.  I am going to try and sum up thousands of pages of content into a few sentences.  They believe that the true root of your issues and unhappiness come from outer space.  A 100 million years ago, there was this horrible immortal volcano ghost/god/monster named Xenu.

 Think of a whole box of Satans together, all imbued with power of god. He took all the people on Earth, and threw them all in a volcano.  However, many of their souls escaped the volcano and their mortal forms. These poor innocent souls escaped the Xenu’s volcano of doom by hiding in 747s.  I know you are thinking that maybe 747s didn’ exist until about 60 years ago, right? Shut up. Because it is about get dumber.

They believe that these escaped souls are still around, and have seeped into your soul.  When they do this, they plant negative thoughts and emotions deep inside you. These self doubt moments are called ‘Engrams’.  You may not be surprised to find out that only Scientologists have the cure/answer to these pesky things. They identify them off you using a very very crude homemade lie detector thing called an ‘e meter’.  It is said that L Ron Hubbard was an OT (operating Thetan, it is the rank system in Scientology) 13.  The highest known OT level of a living man is Tom Cruise.  It is believed he is an OT7.   Know how people who play roll playing fantasy games say things like “I am an orc leader, with plus 25 charisma”.   That is your Scientology OT levels to the rest of us.

Anyhow… see why I may as well cast the whole movie about a benevolent Martian with nothing but Scientologists.  Bonus self imposed challenge? Not using Tom Cruise, the world’s most famous Scientologist.

This book is very influential in the sci-fi cannon.  But according to my thorough research (Rotten Tomatoes & IMDB, no one has made a movie. Let’s make one together, by Xenu!  Do you grok that, crackers?

Characters:

Michael Valentine Smith Ryan Gosling.  He is beautiful to look at, can help carry the box office, and seems super capable of being creepy and staring into space for no reason.

Jill – Laura Prepon.  I am just in love with her.  OH… and I am going to write a scene, for artistic reasons only, that will have Laura Prepon topless. Click here, NSFW

Jubal HarshawIssac Hayes – the character is old and cranky and mean.  Yet, incredibly resourceful and tough as barbwire.  He takes shit from no one.  He also has major contempt for any societal conventions and govt rule.  Who better than a super successful black actor?  Really, it should be Morgan Freeman, but the Scientologist haven’t gotten their hands on him… yet.

Ben Caxton Giovanni Ribisi – just because Ribisi is brilliant in everything?  Remember his breakout role in Friends?  He is Phoebe’s little brother.  “What are your interests?” – (Ribisi’s character – “well, I like things that melt.  and I… uh.. dislike things that don’t melt.”  

Secretary General Joseph DouglasJohn Travolta – perfect for a presidential role  He looks like a president:  handsome, carries himself with confidence, is white, and about the right age.  I know people love to make fun of him, but his acting chops are absolutely top notch.

Ann, Miriam, & DorcasLeah Remini, Elisabeth Moss, and Erika Christensen  These ladies are the very attractive personal assistants to Jubel Hershaw.   Leah is there, also, to rescue them all from the cult.  She is an SP, you know!

Danny Masterson – doesn’t he get a part?  No, fuck him.  He is a rapist.

Soundtrack and musical director – Beck – Beck is awesome.  He is a musical genius, and a great and innovative songwriter.  and of course, is a Scientologist.

 

I have done the hard work, now get out there and raise some capital so we can do this.  This isn’t my first movie rodeo, either.  I wrote about the Dougherty Gang years ago, and now its being made into a movie.

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Friday Fives – there is no thru-line here

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*** special guest content at the bottom.  Thanks, James!

 If you get to have a third arm and got to choose its placement, where would you put it on your body?

On my back.  I would be backadextrious!®

You get to pick one superpower to just give to one of your friends.  What do you pick? 

So they get the superpower, and not me?  Then, invisibility. He can get me lots of money, which he should.  And take naked selfies of hot celebs and send them to me. Now, is it the most fulfilling for him?  No, flying would be. However, we are not concerned about him. He already has my superpower. Know what would be rad about being invisible?  Besides using it to look at nekkid ladies (seriously, that is about 70% of my motivation. Any guy who says otherwise is a dirty liar!) I would use it to hang out in the White House, during any administration, and see what is really going on in there?  Is it more West Wing… we are all eager civil servants with the highest honor of working in the highest office? OR… more House of Cards? Backstabby! I would imagine somewhere between the two.

If you could choose a movie from your youth or past and fill it with CGI and 3D what film would you pick? 

I don’t know, but it makes me think of this.  Know what was really great about movies before computers?  Everything you saw on screen… someone had to do that shit! Look at the chase scene in the Blues Brothers.  They just crush about 20 cop cars. Then, they absolutely destroy Daley Plaza. These days, they would just photoshoppe in all those cars and accidents.  Especially explosions. It’s really easy to walk away from a green screen while they add an explosion in post production. Before about 1990, they really blew shit up.  It was terrific!

What book/movie world would you want to live in and why?

Fish Called Wanda.  Capers and crime and peak hotness Jamie Lee Curtis.  Everyone is a smartass, and everyone is drop dead hilarious.

You’re walking down the street, and look up to a see a man being carried off by a very large bird. What do you do?

Continue to watch.  Not sure he will be back.  Assuming this doesn’t happen often, I’ll need to explain that shit.   WAIT… scratch that. I have my cell phone. Film that shit!

With that being said… what the hell was that question?  What did that have to do with any of this?

 

**** bonus contributor this week.  Jamie, the original ‘Arizona Monkey Boy’ has sent in his.   You must remember Jamie.  You don’t?  Let this masterpiece of storytelling jog your memory >

If you get to have a third arm and got to choose its placement, where would you put it on your body?

First… i have a third arm… i keep it in my pants…

You get to pick one superpower to just give to one of your friends.  What do you pick? 
flying… not for me… and I’ve talked about this before.

Let’s say Led Zeppelin is doing a concert TONIGHT in Phoenix… you have a free ticket… and all you have to do is fly here. Do you really think you know the way? If it were me… I’d STILL have to take the freeway.

What if the concert was in Paris? Could you FIND Paris while flying? I mean… I know it’s north/east… and if i see the Eiffel Tower… sure… but i won’t be flying at night… that’s for sure!!

I really think flying would be more of a curse… than a blessing.

Flying… you also need PERFECT vision… can’t get cold easily… wind burn protection… and some kind of crazy built in GPS in the brain.

Thoughts?
**** editors note – great perspective, James.  We think of the romantic aspect of flying and a metaphor for freedom.  Really, though… you are just always lost and always cold.  AND… doing favors for all your friends.  You may note that Jamie didn’t even read the question.  The question was what superpower would you give to your friend?
and he is missing most of the questions.  Overall, I give this an A+, though.  His take on flying just nails it.
Update to that update – I asked him to follow up with the rest of the q&a.  and he did… kinda
The other questions don’t interest me. Although… I’d like to live in Wilt Chamberlain’s autobiography… as long as I’m not one of the 20,000 girls. Just do it? More like… just Wilt it.

Anyway… the flying thing has always bugged me. Maybe it’s all the PTSD I have from delivering pizzas. I can just picture myself delivering a pizza… and flying at 2 mph… and saying… where the f_ck is this house?!

Flying would be good for commuting to work and home… that’s it. There’s no real way to make money doing it… but you could save a little.

Friday Fives – culinary bs

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Have you ever had a nightmare formal dining experience?

No.  But we rarely go out.  And pretty much never to really nice places.  We both like to cook, so why spend the money?  When we do go out to eat (about once a month), it is ALWAYS Mexican.  It’s not even discussed.

What is the worst thing to serve at an all you can eat buffet? 

Arson?  Chicken.  Chicken dries out so very easily.  Odds are, it was already dried out the minute they plated it.  If not, 10 minutes or more under a heat lamp will just leave you with shoe leather.  And chicken is my favorite food, so its hurts me to say this.

What is your quick to prepare and impress for company dinner to host with just minutes notice?

I regard myself as an incredible improv cook.  I used to call it drunk cooking, but I don’t drink much anymore.  Put me in your house.  You have a meat of some kind in the fridge or freezer?  A couple veggies?  Got a starch?  Got some spices?  Every middle age home has these things.  I can feed you all with something super tasty that is just pulled out of my (metaphoric) ass.   Go ahead, test me!

What is your grab and go reliable lunch to take to work?

Yogurt.  Yummy, portable, cheap, low sugar, and high protein.  (note how I still incorporate the Oxford comma in a group of four.  Don’t be a dick!)

What is your favorite dish that your mom used to make for you?

Many, but her beef stroganoff*** was my favorite.

 

 

*** spellcheck is telling me stroganoff is not a word.  Either I am spelling it wrong, or Bill Gates had a shitty childhood with no stroganoff.  Let’s just assume the latter.

Friday Fives – i discuss ghosts and aliens honestly

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Do you remember the Apollo 11 mission?  Or any of the subsequent moon visits? 

No.  Is that the one where Tom Hanks saved Buzz?  That was before my time.

Do you remember the first space shuttle launch? 

No.  BUT… I remember the big crash, the first one.  I was home from school that day.  Some interesting trivia about that event you didn’t know.  That was the first space shuttle launch to not be carried live.  They were just becoming routine at the time.  Anyhow, I remember the news broke in and showed the footage.  I remember the verbiage they used ‘there appears to be a malfunction’.  Note, (and I am working from memory here), the space shuttle doesn’t appear to just explode at that point.  It kinda breaks into two streams.  That was also a big deal not just because it was the first real bad crash/explosion, but was the first shuttle with a civilian on it.  Teacher Krista McAllife (again, just working from memory for integrity purposes, of course this can all be googled for veracity… had a an editor.

Remember Skylab? 

Not sure.  That was the pre-cursor to the ISS, right?  Like, a neutral space station everyone could hook up to?  Make a potty run right before the long drive home?

Should we try to get to Mars? 

I am super conflicted on this.  First question is… why are we going?  Are we going for science?  Ok, then I am in.  Or… are we going because Earth is totally fucked and we need a back up?  I guess I am in that way, as well.  Just wish someone would say that out loud, though.  At 47, I’ll be dead before any of this fully manifests (people living on Mars), so it isn’t for me to say.   Being a liberal, I can’t help but think we could take that money and spend it on health care and education right here and right now.  Maybe if we addressed climate change, we wouldn’t need to go to Mars.

Are there space aliens out there?

Isn’t ‘space aliens’ redundant?  Let’s just call them aliens.

I feel the same away about this that I do about ghosts.  I think probably yes, but I could be convinced otherwise.  Were the existence of ghosts and/or aliens a totally binary question that I had to answer yes, or no… I vote yes to both.  But, I have no experience with either.   Well, maybe some harmless ghosts in our college apartment on Agassiz.

careful… it gets a bit ranty down there.

Since we are here, I might as well give this speech… and I likely have here many times before.  Anytime someone says life couldn’t exist on other plants because of _____ or lack of ____, I want to dope slap them.  Maybe our kind of life couldn’t exist, which has specifically evolved to work in our environment.  If someone says “there couldn’t be life on Venus.  The surface temperature is 8000 degrees.  Life would boil alive!”  I think ‘maybe OUR lives would’.  Since we don’t even know how big space is, it is INSANE to think we are the only life.  I would imagine life somewhere else is having a discussion like this.  They are saying “we have looked, and there is NO way there could be life on Earth.  With an average temp of 72 degrees, all life as we know it would spontaneously combust.  Not to mention an atmosphere of nothing but oxygen and nitrogen.  HAH.  There is virtually zero percent breathable sulfur on Earth.

Ok, that was my stump speech on aliens and life on other planets.  NEXT UP- ghosts.

Here is why I firmly believe ghosts are very possible.  Our bodies are electrical.  Everything happening in the brain is electrical.  Remember the end of the Matrix?  How it turned out our bodies were kept in stasis just to be used as batteries for the aliens?  Ok, we have established that.  Einstein said, and I just fucking love this quote and thought and theory “energy can be neither created nor destroyed”.  Our bodies are energy.  Not in a touchy feely new age way, in a science way.   We take in calories, harvest what we can for energy, and shit the rest out.  If you shoot a guy, and trust me I know… where does that energy go?  I don’t have an answer, I admit.  This is why I just say I am open to all of this.

Plus, it makes life way more fun to include these possibilities.

*** cool side note – I am right now finally reading ‘Stranger in a Strange Land’.  I know I am 30 years late to the party, but I have been avoiding fiction for the last decade or so until recently.  What are the odds?  Details here

 

 

Friday Fives – Dirk Cougar edition

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Any big summertime plans for the remainder of the summer?

Yes.  As usual, a mix of concerts and light travel. Beck, Penn & Teller, a camping trip to Northern AZ, Brandi Carlile, and I am officiating a wedding.

What’s your idea of the perfect summer day?

It’s hot as hell out, so I might as well be a work in the AC.  Come home and watch the sunset on the porch with the wifey having some cocktails and listening to whatever new country star she has discovered.  I am now down with Dierks Bentley, and she also is the one who discovered Chris Stapleton.   Now, is there a worse name than Dierks Bentley?  What was he thinkin’? Can you imagine his managers have been trying to get him to change his name since day one?  It shows to me he is a man of character to stick with that unwieldy ass name.

Let’s change it to… Dirk Cougar!

How do you beat the summer heat?

Hide!  We don’t have AC.  We have a swamp cooler, with is fine for 90% of our cooling needs in Colorado.  However, it is mid 90s these days, and the swamp cooler can only do so much.  Usually, we are at work.  If we are off, though, we often escape to a movie.   In fact… did you know that air conditioning was INVENTED for movies?  It was in NYC, and one theater owner had a competitive edge idea… to cool his building down.  It was wildly successful, as the rest of the earth said ‘hey, why don’t we do that?’  It didn’t become commonplace in residential homes until the 60s, though.

In 1925, The Rivoli Theater in New York City’s Times Square approached Carrier to install the very first unit. Patrons flocked to see movies in cool comfort, and Carrier’s wildly successful invention is now credited with fostering the summer blockbuster.


Insert cliché summer/heat question here:

Um… ok.  I’ll come back around to this one.  Pass!

Do you have air conditioning?

No.  we have never had AC in Colorado.  We went from nothing but lots of fans for years when we were young and poor and tough.  Then, our first wonderful house on Dandelion had an attic fan.  That was all, but it was amazingly effective.  It was a 2 story house, and the whole house kinda came up to a point.  Where it did that, there was a HUGE fan that would simply whisk hot air out of the house, and draw up cooler air.  Now, we have a swamp cooler, which is just terrific.  The house still gets warm, but it is never hot.  And by late evening, that thing gets the house super chilly (50s), and we turn it off.

I see AC in Colorado similar to having heat in Phx, AZ.  It’s nice to have, but not essential.

Also, last year we finally broke down and bought a portable AC unit.  Not the thing that mounts in the window, but close.  It is a standalone thingy on wheels, and basically will cover one room.  I know Americans don’t believe the news, but it is getting warmer on average every year.  This summer was the hottest summer in history in Europe.  Everyone who wants to argue that climate change isn’t real should have to disable their fans and AC.  I just know anecdotally how much hotter every year has been.  Luckily this year, we didn’t hit 90s in Denver until July.

Friday Fives – a patriot’s look at things

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What is one of your favorite things about your country? 

As flawed as we are, it is still the best place for opportunity for an ambitious and talented person.  Am reminded of the Bill Graham quote about the Grateful Dead:  “they may not be the best at what they do, but they are the only ones who do it!”  I am lucky enough to have traveled and seen just how fucked up the world is.  Doesn’t mean we don’t need a lot to work on, but in America there is always hope.

What is your favorite thing to do on your country’s national holiday?

It is best summed up by a quote from HJ Simpson – “What better way to celebrate our nation’s independence than by blowing up a small part it.”

What do you usually do for your country’s national holiday?

Didn’t we just address that above?  I guess I didn’t.  We watch from home, here’s why.  We live way East of town, up on a hill.  Specifically, Denver is famously 5280 feet, my house is at 6200 feet.  So, from my porch, we can see West all the way from Castle Rock on the South end to Boulder at the North.  For free, we gather with the neighbors at one of our yards and sit around and watch the city explode with light.  Last night, around 9:15 pm, we could see 6 or 7 different professional firework displays at the same time.

What is your favorite national/regional ethnic dish?

Does it have to be my region, or ethnicity?  My favorite dish, ‘ethnic’ or otherwise, is the gyro sammich.  When done right (which is almost never the case), it is the perfect sammich on every level.  Sadly, I spent a good 20 minutes last night chatting with one of my neighbors about the perfect gyro.

Who is your favorite national hero and why?

Nelson Mandela.  Not my nation, mind you, but what he did for South Africa transcends all of this.  After spending decades in prison, unjustly… upon his freedom he went on to be president of South Africa.  What a hero.  Jesus may have died for our sins, but Mandela lived for them!

Side note – why didn’t they kill him?  Why keep the most famous prisoner on Earth?  I am beyond thankful he lived a long and fruitful life.  If I were the bad guys, though, I would have just disappeared him.  Had they done that, he would be an obscure footnote that no one remembered.

Friday Fives – it ain’t about bats!

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How do you take your tea?

Up the pooper (with Matte,  of course)  You?

God passes you the aux cord and let’s you put on a song for the entire world to listen to. Which song will you play?

The long lost acoustic secret version of Jimi Hendrix’s ‘Angel’.  How secret? Even I don’t have a copy. Even the internet doesn’t have a copy.  In case God also doesn’t have a copy, we’ll do well to share ‘Into the Mystic’ from Van Morrison or ‘the Day Brings’ from Brad.  Any one of these tunes could join and save all humankind.   See how I am not linking to a version of Angel from Jimi Hendrix.  The song does indeed exist. It was released posthumously. However, the one they released is overproduced schlock.  The version I once heard (and have reason to believe the great Chris Young may physically possess) is so perfect that I won’t muddy it with the ‘official’ version.

Do you know how tiny his career was?  Not his influence, or his impact… but the actual career?  Stunningly short. He only released 3 albums in 3 years. Never had a hit with an original song.  Let’s be honest, unless you were Eric Clapton, not many knew or appreciated Jimi during his time.

What simple task are you surprisingly bad at?

Ironing.  It is totally lost on me.  Unless I am ironing a pocket square… it’s gonna be ugly.  I just can’t iron anything. For each straight line/run I create…  a makes new wrinkles underneath. I am not against ironing, I am just incapable.   And please do not for a minute thing I am pulling some kind of macho ‘women iron my clothes’ shit.  I wish I could iron. Luckily for me, there is an easy remedy. I drop them by my dry cleaners once a week.  $1.25 a shirt, problem solved. Even if I could iron… time is money!

What are you STILL mad about?

Fleetwood Mac choosing Stevie over Lindsay… and Stevie for putting them in that position.  You likely know Fleetwood Mac fired Lindsey Buckingham a couple years ago.  Stevie and Lindsay were fighting again, which isn’t news.  In fact, Stevie and Lindsay fighting is the best selling album of all time ‘Rumours’.   Before their latest re-union tour, Stevie told the others ‘either Lindsay goes or I go’.  When I say ‘they’, I can only assume this is about Mick Fleetwood It’s his band. You may also know that LONG before they became the California sound, they were an old crusty British Blues band.  Did you know Santana’s hit ‘Black Magic Woman’ is a Fleetwood Mac cover?

Too long a story told short – Lindsay Buckingham saved the band.  Hell, he saved the music industry. EVERY Fleetwood Mac song you know is likely written by Lindsay.  His includes all the great Stevie songs. Let me state without question – if there were no Stevie Nicks, Lindsay Buckingham would still be an epic guitar star and songwriting here.  If there were no Lindsay? Stevie would be your waitress at Chili’s who wears a ton of flare, but not in a hipster way.   Prolly in Sedona. I think Stevie owes just about everything to Lindsay.  So getting him booted from the band is beyond fucked up. And putting the band in that position?  Super dick move! Bonus? They literally broke his heart!  I know I am given to hyperbole and exaggeration… but they really actually broke they guy’s heart!  After the news, we found out Lindsay had to have some kind of open heart surgery.   Bad, huh?   Oh… it gets worse > AND… the surgery damaged his vocal chords.  He may never sing again.  Thanks a lot, Stevie!

Listen, I like Stevie.  Even saw a solo tour of hers.  She is from Phx, and briefly went to my high school.  Rumor had it that her folks owned ‘Compton Terrace’, which was the original outdoor shed (your city has one.  Half seated, half lawn. Odds are Eddie Money money might be playing there as we speak. And we all had a crush on her.  HOWEVER… and no point in time would I ever choose Stevie over Lindsay. That is like choosing Liam over Noel. Yeah, Liam is a good singer, but Noel wrote them ALL.   If you choose Stevie in this conflict, then you are on team Milli Vanilli, and likely kick puppies.

Phew.  ok. Listen… you asked!  Plus, its still only a few years ago.  Thing that makes this hurt the most is everyone is in their 60 or 70s now.  We may not have time for the classic Fleetwood Mac breakup cycle. Read this, Rolling Stone did a nice and brief piece just on breakups.

And if nothing else, people, his music makes Christie Brinkley appear!  EVERY time.  That alone should be worth some kind of medal.

Ok, so I am still mad about that.  And Fife Symington.  But mostly it’s just football injustices.  Guess that is a first world problem to have.

Mostly stupid sports related things.  Corey Dillon running 300 yards against the Broncos in a single game.  Coach Shanahan answering the press when they ask him how he is going to handle the Broncos going against the Bears who had the greatest special teams returner in history.  He said (of Devin Hester) “yeah, we are going to kick it to him.” Conventional wisdom is in a situation like that, you just kick it in the end zone. Or, ideally, down the field away from the returner where it bounces out of bounds.   OR… if for some gonzo reason you are really going to hand the ball to Hester… don’t announce it to everyone. Guess what happened? Dude ran back THREE kick returns. Man, watching Devin Hester was just an honor. Let’s see if we can find some clips.   Ooh… let’s not just link. Let’s embed! When stealing content from the NFL, its best to go big. Since they are a charity after all!

Dated: What’s the best music video you’ve ever seen?

Well, none of them seem to age well.  However, I love this quirky song so deeply that even this bizzare ass video holds a big place in my childhood.  Wait, that is just a great song, not a great video.  How about this one? I think it’s the fingerless gloves that somehow legitimized the band to me.  Oh, and I was lucky enough to see these guys live in their heyday! Saw them with the Police and Thompson Twins in about 1982.  That should move them to the top… and it might have.. Had they only the courage to wear overalls. This song is so great, as well, that is deserves and embed and not just a link.

Ok, in that video above… are they going for a look of the 50s?  I can’t tell. It’s England, and I certainly hadn’t been there when I was in 6th grade.  This look… is it retro, or punk? Is it working class? Is this just how people dress in England?  I had no idea, and I think that is what made it all so romantic!

Ok, can I lastly give props this video.  Watching this video looks almost too good to be true.  Do they really sound this good? Is the singer actually that intense?  Would he EVER hang from lighting rigging if there wasn’t a film crew around?  That answer to all those things is many times. I have seen them about 20 times, including 3 times just on this tour promoting their breakthrough ‘Ten’.  He did crazy shit like that every night of that tour, and likely many others.

OK, sorry I missed last week’s fives.  I have a good reason. I was on the beach in Mexico playing guitar.  Here is proof! Remember me thusly.  So, this is an extra long entry.

 

Mexico guitar beach 2019