Judge, jury, hipster Reverend

I am not a judge, nor am I part of the judicial process.  While it is true that I am both an ordained Reverend, and a member of the bar… I hold no legal sway.  I should clarify that last comment.  I am, in fact, a member of the bar.  I simply didn’t say what bar.   Last year I was traveling for business in Utah.  Yes, truly regrettable.  Anyhow, a few of us went out for beers after the conference.

In Utah, you can’t just walk into a bar and have a beer.   Seriously.  You have to be sponsored, and then pay a membership fee.  It sounds like a fancy term for a ‘cover charge’, right?  It ain’t.  They took and ran my drivers license through their state scmods and then charged me $8 to be a member of that bar.   It is a totally retarded state, run entirely my overzealous Mormons.

Sadly, it is also the most beautiful state I have ever visited.  Too bad I will never return on principle.

Focus, that isn’t why we are writing, here.  I am writing to say I have a strong feeling about that missing girl from Florida.  This story.

Here is my report.  The parents are involved.  The parents are guilty.  Case closed.  I don’t even know what happened to that girl, or if she is ok.  I am guessing she is not.  According to Amber Alert data, missing children are generally killed within hours.

Regardless, the parents are involved.   Now, without knowing any more than you, how can I judge like that?  Well, for starters… let’s look at Dad.  Dad went off to work and left the babies with his 17 year old live in girlfriend.

Read that again.  Not only is this guy having sex with children (17 is a minor), he is letting his little fuck buddy watch the family in his absence.  Nice work, Dad.

How about the mom, where was she?  Well, she wasn’t in the picture.  That isn’t really our business.  However, when grilled about her missing daughter, the absent mom admitted their relationship was ‘rocky’.

Rocky?  Wtf?  This is a 5 year old.  This is your 5 year old.  How does one have a rocky relationship with a kindergartner.  They love you, they worship you.  All you have to do is let them know for sure you love them unconditionally.

So, I hope this kid makes it back safe.  Not quite sure who she would be better off with, though.  I am having a very ‘Gone baby gone’ moral dilemma.  Ah hell, Nancy Grace probably took the damn kid.  Anyone search her house yet?  Word is she is shacking up with David Caruso these days.