Friday Fives

1. Will your memoir be a Hollywood blockbuster?

are you implying it wouldn’t be?
2. What was your favorite as a kid: comics, cartoons, or movies? Was there a specific title you liked most?

loved cartoons.  Watched Scooby Doo every day.  Also loved the James Bond movies.
3. Do you read genre fiction?

   no.  Don’t read fiction at all.  I am an aggressive reader, but non fiction only.  There is so much real life, with so many real amazing people who did real things, I want to learn from them.  Compare myself to them.  To me, and I know this sounds pretentious… but reading fiction is a waste of time.
4. Are there aliens out there?

I don’t think so, but I can’t say otherwise, either.  I feel the same about aliens as I do about ghosts.  I neither believe in them… nor not believe in them.  Does that make sense?  I am agnostic on those issues.
5. If you could recommend one underrated movie to people what would it be?

oh man, I have two.  ‘Gotcha’ and ‘Summer School’ are the best bad movies ever made.  Rent them.  Buy them.  Wait, both sold so poorly, I don’t think either was actually made into DVDs.

Advertisement

to that old guy the Scooby Doo kids caught

Listen,

You knew about that gold in the old amusement park.  Smart!  You bought the amusement park, so as to get that buried gold.  Huzzah!  You pieced together a way to scare away any remaining guests.  It appears all the gold will be yours.  You will be rich beyond your wildest dreams.  It has all paid off.

Then, you got taken out by these guys.  Really?  I mean…  really?

I mean, really?  These five are keeping you from all your wildest dreams?  Let’s asses.  The dumpy one in the orange sweater.  No threat, kill her.  Even if you miss, she can’t identify you.  She lost her glasses in the mine.  The tall guy?  He isn’t just a coward, he is high as a kite.  Kill him.  The dog?  No problem, dogs can’t talk.  Let him go.  Ok, the next guy is a valid threat.  He is huge.  Wait, wait… is that an ascott?  Is he really wearing an ascott?  Ok, just kill him.   The tall gal?  Kill her.

I mean, how did you get your ass kicked by these… puftas?  I mean, heck, I will kill them for you.  Gimme ten grand and I off them all (except the dog).

Deal?