Friday Fives – further shitting on Chris Brown

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Who is a famous person that’s very talented but is also a piece of shit?

Chris Brown.  Not just because he tried to beat his girlfriend to death.  That isn’t hyperbole, btw… by the time the police showed up he was still beating her.  Yeah, he is going to hell for that.  Could you imagine something worse?  He tattooed her bloody face from the hospital photos on to his neck.

What is something in the 2010s that you miss?

Being excited about watching a movie… dvd or whatever.  You couldn’t always get what you wanted, so you were appreciative of what you had.  Now, I just turn on the tv and I can load a highly anticipated zillion dollar blockbuster in my home for a couple clicks and a few virtual dollars.  We take these things for granted.  While I fully appreciate the convenience, especially living 45 minutes out of town.

What’s the stupidest thing that has a large fan base?

Chris Brown

What’s a song lyric that you completely misheard for a while?

Oh man, I LOVE this topic.  There are tons.  Let’s go with the ‘Damadadian Rights’.  Do you even know your Damadadian rights?  You don’t, do you.  Have you even read the United States charter in the UN?  The famous amendment from 1986, about prisoner treatment.  God, you’re so dumb sometimes.  Well, so was I… until Metallica came along.  They have a bad ass song from their second album.  It’s called ‘Ride the Lightning’, which is a reference to being put to death in the electric chair.  Here is the lyric of concern –

Guilty as charged
The Damadadian rights***
There’s someone else controlling me
Death in the air
Strapped in the electric chair
This can’t be happening to me

I assumed the ‘Damadadian rights’ were a thing.  Tough to say for sure, because its thrash metal.  Turns out… that isn’t a thing.  Nor was it what he was saying.  What James was singing is – “Guilty as charge, but damnit it ain’t right…”

Hmm.  That does make a LOT more sense.  Let’s listen to the song and see if you can hear what I did.  You don’t have to stay long, it’s the opening verse.

What device, service, or app do you use to listen to music today?

It’s all virtual and digital.  My truck doesn’t even have a CD player.  I owned the thing a week before I even noticed.  I use Spotify, and I LOVE it.  and… I PAY for it.  Everyone should.  Actually, if we wanted to take the high road for the artist, we wouldn’t stream at all.  They make pennies per millions of ‘spins’.  I am ticked that not only can I listen to an album the day it comes out… they do box sets.  There is like a 4 or 5 cd box set re-issue of the most perfect rock album ever – Appetite for Destruction.  I didn’t buy it.  I would have, but the no CD player thing.  Well, its all on Spotify.

*** correction, I do have a working CD player… it’s the Blu Ray player in the family room.  Sadly, it never gets used much at all.  In its day, that thing was the bomb!  It wasn’t just a Cd and Blu Ray DVD player, but also was a smart tv hookup.  By putting the Blu Ray player online, we could watch Netflix or whatever their their smart tv.  That was a gonzo value for $124

Friday Fives – my speech is gooder you racist

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How is the relationship with your family?

It’s great.  Health and happy, nothing but love.  Frankly, its why I will never be great.  It seems all great men come from fucked up families.  People who are wildly successful struggled as kids for food, love, attention… everything.  They learned to fight.  Most great musicians lost their mothers at really young ages.  I am 50, and my mom is alive and well and is my favorite person in the world.  Don’t tell my wife I said that.  KIDDING!  She can’t read, so no threat there.

Growing up I had enough love, food, attention… the works.  You’ll never believe this, but being a straight white male born in North America has an upside.  I won the lottery on every level.  Not just being born a straight white male in the US is pretty fucking great.  On top of that, I was born to an awesome family who I love to the bones.  Being a liberal and caring human, there was a long time I felt bad about winning this lottery.  I took about 30 or 40 years, but I finally figured I should appreciate it, and use it to the advantage of others.

How is your relationship with your manager?

Great, why?  Is there something I don’t know?  I love my boss, and she loves me.  I think the most important bond we have is trust.  There is a great saying that goes like this – “integrity is what you do when no one is looking”:  We both know that the other is working hard, and has the companys’ and employees best interest at heart.  As you can imagine, that isn’t always the case in corporate America.

How is the relationship with your neighbor?

I fucking love my neighbors.  We spend a LOT of our time together.  We travel the world together.  We live somewhat isolated on a small ranch on a dirt road half an hour out of town.  This means it isn’t practical to go into down to drink or party or whatever.  Its expensive, time consuming, and you can’t drink.  Finding like minded folks when we moved out here… we just hang out at each others houses.  Yes, Ric and Jenn are gone…and Rachel and Jason.  Yes, I cried about the latter.  I am still pretty upset and in denial as well, since they moved out of state.  Both couples took the stupidly high real estate values and cashed out.  BUT… we will have Sally, Linda, Karen and Andy, Luis and Lupita, Jared, Rod… etc

Here is how close we are.  We not only hang out here together and travel together… of that list above I have married two of the couples.

What is your absolute favorite useless fact?

Lemmy started out his career in music as a roadie.  For Jimmy f’n Hendrix!

What kind of accent do you have?

I don’t have an accent.  YOU have an accent.  Oh yeah?   What if I said I can prove it, racist!  South Metro Denver has one of the largest concentration of call centers in the entire us.  Just in the Inverness area is about 100K cubicle type call center jobs.  Why?  Two reasons seem to emerge.  One is a combination of rail lines and good weather.  He who controls the rail lines controls all communications.  Why is that?  Because whomever owns the railroads owns not just the land the tracks are on, but 10 feet in both directions.  This is likely for safety and logistical reasons.  Now… let’s say you want to run a phone line across the country.  Lets say you need an uninterrupted space that crosses the country to bury fiber optic cable.  You could try and contact about 1500 different landowners… and PRAY that they have mineral rights.  Mineral rights are if you own the ground under your house.  The reason people have and would be interested in mineral rights is if oil or gold was found on your property.  I would say 80% of American homeowners do not own the mineral rights to their property.

OR… you could contact the railroad.  You could deal with 1 single company that can connect you coast to coast and city to city.  These lines converge in Denver, and Denver is a popular spot because its pretty close to being in the middle of the continent.

What does that have to do with accents?  Above?  Nothing at all.  Its about the other reason all telecom is based here.  It is because we don’t have accents.  We are so in the middle in Colorado that we can talk to anyone in the country and no one would say ‘where are you calling from’.  In fact, our lack of discernible accents actually counts as an accent.  Linguists love this stuff… and you know I have always wanted to pretend to be a linguist.

Officially, most linguists would say that Coloradoans have an unmarked, neutral, or no accent, commonly known as Standard American English. Without a very distinctive sound in our speech that is highly recognizable or that makes people go, “Oh, you must be from Colorado!”, it is hard to say that there is a specific Colorado accent.

So I don’t have an accent, k?  Sometimes I use words I don’t know so people think I am more photosynthesis.











Friday Fives – ends up being about Taylor

What is the last song/bit of music you heard?

Willfully?  Like… not counting a jingle on tv or such?  The last piece of music I willfully listened to was Caamp last night.  I was vacuuming, and I always put in hearing protection when I vacuum or mow.  That way, I am both protecting my ears, and being entertained.  Caamp is a great groovy mellow band.  If you know a song of theirs, it would be this one below.  They just put out a new album, and I have been listening to it.  We are going to see them next month at Red Rocks, so I want to be school on the new stuff.

You know… it just occurred to me, I don’t think I have been to Red Rocks this summer.   Wait, I was… I remember worry about my knee.  I was in a knee brace AND a cane.  That is a BIG problem if you are at Red Rocks.  Its build into the side of a mountain, with no handicap access or elevators or anything to get around.  What show was that?  GOT IT – it was Billy Strings.  Billy Strings and Caamp are both bands we saw this year in Phx at the Innings Festival.  What a great show that was.  In just one day, across a couple stages, we got to see Billy Strings, Caamp, the Foos!  It was my first Foo Fighter show, I was stoked.  I like their music, and I love Dave Grohl.  It turned out to be Taylor Hawkins last US show.  He died a few weeks after we saw them.  Perhaps you know by now, but Taylor was a VERY big part of the Foo Fighters.  The concert featured more screen time for Taylor than Dave.  I’ll add a link to this clip, because this isn’t just the show I was, but almost exactly where I was standing.  This was my view.

I have a lot to say about that concert, maybe I’ll put that together soon.  If I do, it likely won’t be posted here.  It would be on my music site.  I’ll give a teaser for my review of that show.  Every single person there would say it was the greatest rock show they have ever seen in their lives.  I felt it was over produced dreck.  I still had an amazing time, but the theatrics were just too much.  Taylor had 7 different cameras on him.  Yes, I counted. The coolest was a straight overhead.  Taylor wasn’t just a stupidly beautiful and attractive man, he also had an undeniable charisma.  If you didn’t know the lore of Dave Grohl and Nirvana and all that.. and I took you to the Foos show… you would assume the band was called the ‘Taylor Hawkins’ band.  I was super stoked to see him play, too.  I had just watched a documentary about him.  He is also in every other music doc ever made.  The camera loves Taylor, and Taylor loved the camera.

I can’t imagine what Dave Grohl has gone through.  Not only were they super close best friends, but Taylor already had a near fatal overdose a LONG time go… 20 years.  Sorry, that went way off the rails… but welcome to my mind.

Ooh…l squirrel.   Shiny coin!

What movie made you a permanent fan of an actor, and what actor?

Big Fish – Ewan McGregor.  This is the best underrated movie that no one knows.  Like Princess Bride, I own several copies.  Don’t even finish this sentence, go watch this movie.

What’s that one song you hear at the right moment put you in a great mood?

Anything from Cat Stevens.  That guy was great!  IS great.  He is a treasure, and I keep forgetting we still have him.  See, he completely and totally vanished for like 30 years.  He had an epiphany, and I’ve also read a near death experience, at the height of his fame.  So, he quit music, changed his name, and just went bye btye.  He became a Mulsim education guy.  What is cool is he still exudes the same happy relaxey vibe.  Like Joe Myers, his music is a backrub.  And… dude has a great sense of humor.  Remember when he and Ozzy did the ‘peace train’ vs crazy train mash up… live.  It was fucking great!  Check this out.  Its like my two favorite musicians in one wonderful silly masterpiece.

          It can’t be described, but it can be embedded

Do you listen to the same song over and over on repeat? Why?

Yes.  HEY, so do you, you just don’t cop to it.  I don’t listen to music actively like I used to… I guess none of us do.  So, mostly music is a comfort thing for me.  I am not against new music at all.  I just don’t have the energy to seek it out.  I am lucky that wifey is always up for new music, and she has good taste.  And when we find new music we go see it live. Saw Chris Stapleton do a club show, he’s prolly doing stadiums now… and rightfully so.  Saw Billy Strings and Caamp in the last year..  Billy twice, and seeing Caamp again in a few weeks – Red Rocks, baby!

I know I could and should be more new music oriented.  Thing is, I use it as comfort food.  Like food… it may not be the healthiest choice, but there is escapism.  And I feel compelled again to defend myself against this shitty question.  Ever heard of a playlist?  Yeah, that is a thing that every music lover on Earth has built of music they love.

Do you make music, or do you want to?

Yes, and yes.  I am a guitar player, pretty much life long.  I am good.  Certainly not great, but I can hold a room for a couple of hours.  I am so glad I picked it up, its been a life long companion.  People often think of all the things they might do if they could go back in time.  Maybe… save my mother from that oncoming bus, or… invest in Apple. Or, tell Anjelica not to go home with Robbie after that Indiana Jones movie.

Me, I’d bo back and start playing guitar at age 2.  I’d learn all the theory, and prolly pick up piano, too.  Sure, I could learn piano now.  I feel too lazy to invest the amount of time needed.  Remember the Gladwellian ’10,000 hours’?  I believe in that, and at 50… I may have 10,000 hours of leisure time left.  If I do, it needs to be spend helping people and doing good.

Ooh, it’s 10am.  Time for an espresso break and some Kelly and Ryan.